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.She supposed that part of her had fallen in love with Eric that day, too, but itwas never something she felt like talking about, and sure as hell was nothing she dever let Eric know.Some secrets were meant to be private.Chapter Twelve Kat, it s been a long day and you re upset. Frank offered her a mug of coffee. Why don t we call it a night? No. Kat shook her head. No, we re close.I want to keep looking.He didn t look convinced, but shrugged in concession. Okay.What next? What s this? They were back at the Daedalus main menu, and she pointed toone of the folders. Let s see, looks like personnel records, mail transcripts& here s Eric s dailyflight log, Leia s daily payload log&  Wait. Kat pointed. Click on that.She d caught sight of a small transmission icon, an earthbound communicationsent on the day they d awakened from cryostasis.She recognized the numerical useridentification listed with the transmission.Alex had made a call to Earth from thebridge.Frank opened the log file, and Kat found herself watching a grainy video imageof Cassandra Horne s face Alex s wife, Cassie. & we re all right anyway. Alex s voice filled the room, recorded as part of thetransmission log.Kat was seeing what he had seen as he d talked to his wife. Just afew minor course corrections, but Jesus, it could have been worse. I don t want you doing this anymore, Alex, Cassie said. I mean it.It s alwaysone thing or another, and now the navigation computer is resetting itself? What if youhadn t come out of cryostasis? Her voice grew shrill, choked with tears. It s badenough you won t be back until after Crissy graduates from college bad enough toknow you re up there for five years alone with her but to think that somethingmight happen& ? You might not come back at all?Her.Kat felt a sudden chill at that word, at Cassie s cold, bitter inflection. Cassie, you re overreacting, Alex told her in a gentle, condescending voice. Itold you.We re on course again and everything s fine.You don t have to worryabout that, or about Kat, either.Kat s face drained to ashen.What? I ve seen how she looks at you. Cassie frowned. For years now, I ve seenher. So she looks at me, Alex said. Let her.I don t look back.She s a singlemom and you know how they can be every man s their knight in shining armor.You smile at them crooked and they think you want to marry them.It felt like the blade of a knife jabbed into Kat s heart.Her breath caught againstthe back of her throat. Kathryn Emmente is like a guy with tits to me, Alex told his wife, making herlaugh. She s nothing, just someone I work with, no different than Eric Nagel, Iswear to Christ.In fact, I would probably rather fuck Eric, if I had to choose.Atleast he s pretty. Stop it. Cassie giggled, just as Kat s shattered heart pleaded the same thing.Stop it. It s not always going to be like this, Cassie.I m going to leave this job, leavethe Shinkansan Company.But I can t right now, not any time soon.These thingstake time, and there s a lot to figure out in the meantime.But you know you re whatI want.Kat listened to the familiar words repeated nearly verbatim to her in stunnedhorror.Oh, God& ! Kat&  Frank s voice seemed to come from miles away.She stood, swaying dizzily.Suddenly the room felt very muggy and stifling.Shetook a staggering, clumsy step for the door. Kat! Frank said, alarmed now.He stood. I m okay, she told him dazedly. I& I just think I m gonna be sick& She stumbled out the door.She didn t know where to go.She wandered down the hall, struggling to contain her tears.She found herselfback in Eric s room.He was asleep again, and the room was dark.She hesitated inthe doorway, like a small child frightened in the night, and then went and crawled intobed with him.She curled up against his back, wanting some kind of comfort andsecurity from his warmth.He stirred and rolled over.The light in his bathroom was on, and in the dimyellow glow, she saw his eyes open, sleepily. Kat&  he murmured.He brought his hand up and rubbed his eyes. What isit? Oh& ! Kat s tears spilled. Oh& oh, God, Eric& ! Hey&  He touched her face, and she had no defense against such a tendergesture.She broke down into hysterical sobs.Frightened and awake now, Eric propped himself up on his elbow so he couldlook down at her. Kat, what is it? Tell me what s wrong.She managed to hiccup out the story in between tearful gulps for breath.Whenshe d choked out as much as she could bear, she covered her face with her hands,ashamed. Oh, Eric, I m so sorry I said those awful things to you, she whispered. I didn t& I didn t mean them&  It s all right. He leaned over and hugged her.He canted his face and pressedhis lips against her tear-stained cheek. Please, Kat.Please don t cry.It s all right. He said I was nothing. Kat s eyes flooded with new tears, and she gasped,anguished. He& he said I was nothing, Eric! He was wrong, Eric said.He kissed her cheek again, his lips lighting againsther skin, then the corner of her mouth.He cradled her face between his hands,leaning down so that his nose brushed hers. He was an ass, Kat.She and Eric were good friends, but it had never stopped her from alwaysadmiring him from a distance.Many a time had she caught herself staring, transfixed,admiring the lines and aesthetics of his body. Oh, my God, Leia had said to him. You are that fucking stupid, aren tyou? I should ve known.I ve seen the way you watch her, all moon-eyed andgoof-ass.Had he really watched her like that, as she d watched him, as well?All of this time, and I never realized.I ve been in love with you, Eric. I m so stupid, Kat whispered. No, you re not, Eric said, and he kissed her mouth.His lips were soft and warm and welcome against hers.Kat tilted her head upand kissed him back, opening her mouth, bringing her hands up to his face.Histongue glanced off hers, and as she pulled him closer, a low groan, a longing soundescaped his throat.The kiss grew deeper still; he lay her back against the bed and pressed himselfon top of her.She tangled her fingers in his dark hair, holding him near.They kissedwith the sort of desperate passion that comes from having avoided somethinginevitable for far too long.When at last they parted for breath, he hovered above her,both of them gasping suddenly, windless. Kat&  He touched her face, brushed her hair back from her eyes.She couldfeel his arousal, hard and hot, straining against the fabric of his flight suit, pressingagainst her thigh.She trembled, turning her cheek into the basin of his palm, kissinghis hand.He breathed her name again, his voice anxious and uncertain, but she let him sayno more.She caught his face between her hands and kissed him again, shifting herweight, parting her thighs to enfold his hips, to let the hardening length of him pressfirmly against her.He moaned softly, a wordless plea, as her hand moved betweenthem, fumbling with the zipper-front of his flight suit.He made love to her.She was afraid it would hurt him, hurt his leg, and so sheeased him back against the bed and straddled him.He arched his back, drawing hiships up to greet her as she lowered herself against him.When they began to move intandem, as she drew him deeply into her, he reached up to cradle her breasts againsthis hands and gasped out her name over and over.She moved with him, watching the play of light and shadow across his face as heclosed his eyes, undulating beneath her.She could see when climax came upon him;from the muscles between his neck and shoulders to the stacked plane of hisabdomen, he tensed, hooking his fingers into the soft curves of her hips [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]