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.You've had opportunities-was"After Jamie died?""Exactly.""I thought of it.But there's a funny kind of prideinvolved, Luis.I think I told you the Kentswere once a wealthy family.I promised myselfI'd never go back unless I could be worthy of thename.""You mean go back as a rich woman?""At least well off.So I could properly faceanyone who might remember the family.Especially that son of a bitch Stovall or hisheirs-was She paused a moment."You probablythink I'm crazy.""To be truthful, I should prefer to sayunrealistic."She snuggled against the muscle of his naked arm."Iadmit it.""Then again, perhaps I'm the one who is unrealistic.I listen to you, and I can believe youwillgo back one day.""I don't think I'd be a very good caretaker of thosethings my father prized.The Kents are supposed to bepeople who contribute, remember? I've done nothingmuch but keep myself alive-was"Nonsense, Amanda! You're a generous, lovingwoman.An honorable woman! You made that clearwhen you faced His Excellency-wasShe laughed softly."I love you for saying things likethat.But I'm afraid it's your heart talking, notyour head.""It's the truth!""Oh, Luis, we won't really find out what weare until it's too late to do anything about it.TheSioux believe the only honest verdict on ahuman life comes when it's all over.""Are you saying that trying to live honorably isuseless? I can't accept that.""I can't either-but I do believe the Sioux are rightwhen they claim we see ourselves imperfectly.Untruthfully.And only someone else can judgeus-wasQuietly, Cordoba asked, "Do you meanGod?""The name isn't important, is it? The MandanSioux, for instance, believe that when you die, a greatvine sprouts from the ground near your body.A vinethat's invisible to everyone else.The vine leadsstraight up to the sky-to paradise.Your spiritrises and begins to climb.About halfway up is thecritical point.Either you go all the wayunmolested-or great hands reach down from paradise andPage 66ABC Amber Palm Converter, http://www.processtext.com/abcpalm.htmlbreak the vine, and your spirit falls back to earth,denied heaven because you lived an unworthy life."Amused, she added, "Can you guess who those handsbelong to?""Why, to whoever those Mandan call their God.""No, to an agent of the high spirit.An intermediary.""An Indian Christ?"Merrily, Amanda said, "A very formidable woman.""Awoman?That's blasphemous!""I think it's delightful.I must say yourattitude's typical of men, Luis."They laughed again, and then he returned to the originalthread of the conversation:"Well, I can't worry about the afterlife-I have enoughproblems with the present.""And no dreams?"There was a long moment of silence.Then:"None that will come true.You, though-you have yourBos-ton.Hold onto that, Amanda.You may stillsee your home before that remarkable vine appears.Youhave the will-was He began to stroke her hair."Rightnow, though, your home is here.If only for a shorttime."hisI sometimes wish it could be for a long time, Luis."He pulled her closer."I wish that constantly, Amanda.Constantly." Whenshe fell asleep against him, his cheeks were wet.VIOn the eleventh of April, Santa Anna'stroops captured a flatboat at Thompson'sFerry.They began crossing the Brazos thefollowing day.On the fourteenth, an apparition appeared on theriver coma smoke-billowing monster that chugged andrumbled.Great revolving paddle-wheels propelledthe boat through the water.There wasn't a human beinganywhere on deck.Infantrymen lining the banks grew terrified at thesight-though a few had enough presence of mindto unlimber their muskets and fire at the boxypilot house, where dim figures crouched over awheel.Amanda, watching with a group of terrifiedsoldaderas,tried to calm them:"That's no demon.It's a boat driven by anengine.""Engine-?"Round, frightened eyes signaled a total lack ofcomprehension."Well, just take my word for it-there aren't anyimps in the boat's belly [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]